Dramatic Sales Writing

As you may know if you're on the lists of
financial mailers, one of the basic types of
financial packages is the stock profile. Some
of them actually tell you what company they're
referring to, along with how great the company
is and how its price is going to shoot up 100
times in the next month.

But some of them are "blind" -- they don't
tell you the name of the company. I got
one years ago that I found personally
interesting. You probably won't, but
it's an example of how to divert
attention from the truth by telling
nothing but the truth.

The piece started going on and on about the
"next McDonalds" -- a hamburger franchised
restaurant in another country that was
driving McDonald's crazy because it was
the only company that was beating
McDonalds.

Furthermore, it had opened a store in
the U.S. that was so popular people
were standing in line outside to get
in.

It would be hard for most people to read
this and restrain themselves from wanting
to get in on this sure-fire winner.

I'm not sure now at one point I started
to hear the voices singing in my head,
but I can hear them now, several children
singing, "We love you, Jollibee!"

That used to be Jollibee's song that
they played on their TV ads.

That's the name of the hamburger company
this mail promotion wanted you to buy:
Jollibee's -- Jolly Bee, that is.
Each one has a big plastic jolly-looking
bee in it.

Don't ask me how the two Chinese-Filipino
brothers who founded the company (after
studying McDonald's in America) came up
with the idea of a Jolly Bee, or why
children love a stinging insect. I guess
it's OK since he's jolly!

And everything in the promotion was
correct to the best of my knowledge.
Jollibee's IS more popular than
McDonald's in The Philippines.

There's a Jollibee's in almost any
urban area of any size and they're very
busy -- usually packed.

They did open a branch in the U.S. -- in
a Filipino neighborhood of Los Angeles.
So its popularity there hardly indicates
they're about to compete with McDonald's
in Iowa!

It is an interesting story. The 2 brothers
who founded it liked the McDonald's business
model a lot and copied it well. They did
agree though that McDonald's hamburgers are
far too bland and that Filipinos would want
a spicy hamburger, so that's what they sell.

But I think the Chicken Joy -- a piece or
two of fried chicken with rice and gravy --
is more popular than hamburgers. They are
with people I go with. But they don't eat
the mango fruit pies and I like those.

The next McDonald's? I can't see Americans
going for a spicier hamburger. People who
want "exotic cuisine" probably aren't going
to go to a fast food joint to get it.

They maybe have potential to advance in
Southeast Asia. McDonald's is popular in
Thailand, so they may go for Jollibee's.
Hard to say -- outside The Philippines,
they lose their advantage of being the
national food franchise.

Someday I may well end up buying some
stock in Jollibee, but I can't say it's
going to be the next McDonald's.

Copywriting for Google Adwords

I've got good news for copywriters seeking work
with major mailers.

It's not as bad as we thought.

I've been listening to the AWAI call that was held
on July 20. I could not listen to the live call,
and for some reason had never downloaded or
listened to the MP3 file. But I did just get the
CD-ROM, and now I'm glad I did.

It was hosted by Denise Ford and Robert Bly, for
AWAI. It had 4 guests -- Jenny Thompson of Agora
Health Publishing, which has just been changed to a
name I forget exactly, Lisa Bruenette of Early to
Rise, Kevin and Marcella of Schaeffers Research,
which is most well known for publishing Bernard
Schaeffer's Options Hotline, but also has a number
of other products and services.

One of the questions asked the panel was how many
queries they got from copywriters in a week.

This is what surprised me. See, my original writing
background is in fiction, especially the science
fiction field. Magazine editors get a large
number of story manuscripts every single day. Book
editors don't get quite as many full length novel
manuscripts, but they get more than enough to keep
them busy, plus they get shorter query letters and
sample chapters.

Any major fiction outlet must employer "first readers"
to screen out the dreck -- which is 95% of all submissions.

That's why you sometimes read that your "chances"
of a story or novel being published are 1000 to 1 or w
hatever statistic they're given by some overworked editor.

(In reality, that's very misleading. It's NOT a lottery.
Story editors don't choose stories by random chance.
The 95% that are dreck -- and I have seen some slush
pile stories. By dreck, I mean absolutely abysmal! --
have absolutely ZERO chance of being published. About
4% are so-so. They're basically competent, but just
exciting enough to break through. The 1% that are really
good have a fighting chance.)

I'm sure that the basic concept applies to copywriting
queries. More than we would think make basic mistakes.
Some were listed by the panel through the call. Spelling
errors. Not understanding the client's business.
(Jenny complained that some people thought going to an
acupuncturest qualified them for writing for her health
publications. Kevin and Marcella said some copywriters
asked basic options questions which indicated they hadn't
done their research and weren't ready to tackle a real
financial copywriting project.)

Then some fewer copywriters don't make mistakes but don't
shine either.

And a very few DO breakthrough.

And Kevin and Marcella said they got around 5 queries a
week from copywriters during normal periods. (They get
more after such calls and after AWAI's bootcamp).

Only 5? That's about 1 a day. Write a great query letter
showing you're good, you're competent, you understand
their business and you have a good shot.

Copywriting self-marketing